What Manner Of Month Is This?

Hello Everyone,
Trust you are all doing great!

Here’s the piece for this edition!

1. Picture this: Death In Motion! I was going to work one Wednesday morning, minding my business when suddenly I saw a ‘danfo’ begin to somersault a few metres in front of me. When it finally stopped flipping, people started screaming. Bodies were flung all over the place; the living unhurt scrambled for safety; the living hurt scrambled for life; the un-living hurt lay seemingly lifeless! The hurt had blood all over; some crying; some in shock; some speechless.

It was like I was in a movie scene. A few cars including mine had stopped. I was hysterical! My hands were over my head as I stood and wept! I didn’t know what to do or who to call for emergency. I didn’t remember or know any first-aid tips! The bold tried to help one way or the other. Suddenly all our inadequacies as a state / nation came flooding in! In a civilised society, ambulances would have thronged the scene by now, but nay, not in Las Giddy!

Though I was told that Las Giddy has a few ambulances stationed at strategic points across the state and that surely one of them would have ‘eventually’ got to the accident scene.
As some of us drove off, I couldn’t help feeling helpless and wondering what I could have done. Should I have taken one or two people to the hospital and risk being interrogated by the police; or accused of being the cause of their injuries; or asked to make pledges on their behalf; or gone to look for the ambulances et al.

I was certainly traumatised for a while for what I saw that morning. I relieved the scene over and over again in my mind; and still do every now and then.

Trauma – well that’s what I know it to be, it has become part of daily living here; unfortunately the Las Giddian world probably don’t see it that way! They say its everyday life and that I was only privileged to have witnessed that one!


2. Picture this: Another Las Giddian Inferno! Just a day before the incidence described above, an oil tanker had an accident and burst into flames, claiming 5 cars and 1 life (that’s the report given) in its path! It brought Las Giddy to a standstill, as it happened around the foot of the famous bridge!

I was so lucky that day not to have been caught up in the mayhem. I was supposed to have gone for a meeting but just somehow decided against it and postponed my attendance at the meeting. People that got caught up didn’t get home until 1am; and I’m certain that some other people must have reached home even later than that time!

God have mercy!


3. Picture this: Suffer head! Electricity has gone from worst to disastrous! On a stretch of almost 2weeks, I didn’t have light and water (no electricity for the pumping machine). That chain was broken for a couple of days where light supply was available for a few hours during the night time. As soon as this happened, I had to get up and fill the house with water and do my laundry too till around 2.30am! As I write, I have not seen a blink of electricity supply since Monday! As I was almost out of water supply, I had to go and purchase 2 50litre kegs and filled them up at the office! Can you just beat that!

When I said ‘almost out of water supply’, that practically meant I had just bowls of water left to shower with and none per se for toilet flushing! It became a case of doing ‘whatever’ you could at work rather than at home – you know what I mean! I couldn’t do my laundry for over two weeks and in fact, I’ve not cooked in almost 2 months because of the lack of supply! My fridge/freezer and deep freezer lie empty and will probably remain so for the foreseeable future!

Usually, it’s the people dependent on petrol that suffer from strikes and hikes. Trust me, that’s better than when its diesel that is affected. Diesel is the maker or breaker of most companies. Diesel is scarce and the price is high! Food prices have gone up too and a lot of companies are struggling to keep up their service levels!

God help you if you are stuck under the dryer when the generator man of the salon you are at decides its time to switch off the generator! Off you go still wet! In fact, some places will turn down your custom once evening begins to draw nigh!

May God punish all those in power who have put us into this state!


4. Picture this: The 4th Encounter! Recollect, how I narrated my brother falling victim to armed bandits three times last year. Well in my 18months of being here, a 4th encounter occurred again! Before I go on, I thank God Almighty that he is alive and well and lived to tell the story!

It occurred on the famous bridge! He was on his way home and in traffic. Suddenly as is almost customary, they emerged from nowhere and started on their victims. Unfortunately, he didn’t have any money on him that evening and it is often heard that penny-less victims almost never live to see another day. They were vicious and armed. So, in his penny-less state, he decided to be proactive and run for his dear life whilst he could still do so. And so he ran in the midst of the mayhem and delved somewhere sha! It was a miracle he hadn’t delved into ‘ira’ (marshy land)!

As the raid continued, it turns out that the commissioner of police for Lagos was on the bridge with his entourage; they drove into the robbers operation and gun battle began! Eventually, the gun battle subsided and people began to return to their cars to quickly move from the scene, but not my brother! The commissioner and his team began to look around for the robbers to see if any of them were hiding nearby. Meanwhile, my brother’s hideout was like that of where hoodlums could easily hide. So he started to make his way out so that he won’t be mistaken as one of them – that would have spelt instant death! He was injured but didn’t know what kind or level of injury, so he wasn’t good on speed. He crawled with the little strength he had left and tried to call for help. Somehow by now, his car was the only car left on the scene with doors ajar. So the commissioner and his team refused to leave the scene until they could locate the owner – this is where profiling helps o; if na one jekuredi car now, everyone for don comot!
So they were equally looking out for him. Alas, he was found and they asked if he could drive; he got in whilst they followed him. After going a few metres, he couldn’t go any further, so he beckoned for them to stop. That’s how the commissioner got in his car, drove it and took him to the nearest hospital. He asked him if he was a Christian and what church he attended – he answered accordingly. The commissioner ensured he was duly taken care of at the hospital before leaving with his team.


He came off lightly with a fractured right hand and nothing was taken / stolen due to divine intervention. Thank God for his mercies!


What I hadn’t mentioned before was that he had escaped an estate attack way back in March; but my Uncle got caught up in the mayhem where he had to hide in a gutter for his dear life!

He was at the saloon that evening 6pm-ish on a Sunday evening and suddenly had the urge to get up and go home. Normally, he would stay and chat with ‘the boys’ after his haircut. In fact, he drove past the robbers on their way in. He said he had barely reached home when gunshots were all over the estate and pandemonium ensued as the robbers began their operation. Thank God he left as he had the unction to do so! May we not be at the right place at the wrong time! Amen.


5. And on a lighter note! Remember how my previous blog captured the ‘tailor a la butcher’ episode! Well, I went to church and wore one of the dresses she had so many times attempted service recovery on! Thankfully, I enjoyed the service with no mishap until I was at the Pastor’s office with some friends and church people! I just suddenly felt my zip give up / give way from top to bottom, as I sat listening to a conversation just at the point of lunch about to be served.

It was like I knew something like that may happen! Luckily, I had my scarf with me, so I tied it round my neck so the longer side dropped down my back and covered my exposure. I quietly got up and told the people around I needed to go to the car urgently. That was how I made my escape! What a nightmare!


This Las Giddy dey tire me o! Its all good sha!

That’s all for now! Until the next blog, do take care of your self and stay on top!

Always & Always,
Moi (Still Keeping It Real)